Being naive is a beautiful trait. You are innocent and live in a blissful, easy world. Bad things happen, but of course they don’t happen to you, right?
… And now you are changed. You are not the same person you were before. You will never be able to go back to your old view of the world. You see the harshness you never noticed before and you think that’s all there is. Some days it really seems that way. Today is one of those days.
It was this time last year that I first started therapy. I finally decided to seek help and try to pull myself out of the sadness I felt. It was good for a while, but I can feel this bad starting to creep back into my life. I’m trying so hard to fight it. I notice the anxiety that I had more control of start to overwhelm me. I leave the present. I can feel myself shriveling up. I’m remembering what you did and I’m not going to say a word to anyone.
Challenge yourself to be a better you instead of better than everyone else.
The thoughts may subside, but the past will never leave your mind.
Me: Procrastination at its finest.
No one moves through life unscathed.
—Paul J Wadell
I’m in a weird mental state right now. I don’t want to admit it, but I feel discriminated against because of my lack of religion/spirituality. Just because I don’t believe in God or an outside force doesn’t mean I don’t have morals and don’t understand what it feels like to come from an all time low and rise from the ashes. The reason why I choose not to believe in some greater thing is because I don’t want to pray that something happens. I want to make it happen on my own. You can’t rely on someone else to give you strength because it’s your responsibility to make it happen. And if you can do something without the help of others, completely on your own, you find a greater satisfaction in yourself.
I have made mistakes and have so many regrets. For some things, I still cannot forgive myself. While I see many flaws in what I’ve done, how I’ve acted, and in things I could never control, I’m finally becoming happy with who I am. I am perfectly messed up. I’m proud of where I am now and want to continue my life in this direction. I will make a million and one more mistakes and have just as many regrets. But I will make them knowing that life will be good and I will be happy again.
I have a long to do list, but I’m just feeling so tired, uninspired, and unmotivated. The struggle is real.
I think depression is one of those weird things. Like once you’ve really been depressed, not just sad or upset for a few days, then you realize how hard it is to shake those feelings, even months or maybe years later. They don’t just go away once you’re not in that depressed state. Even when you’re happy, those thoughts and emotions are still lingering around there somewhere, telling you you’re not enjoying life. And it is hard to reject these feelings because you can just so easily slip into that dark place. But even though it is hard, try your hardest to fight it off. You survived it once already. You don’t have to do it again. This time, push it away before it can get to you.
We are not the flexibility, number of turns, height of our jumps, or skills in our tricks. There is more to us. We are overly critical of ourselves and strive for more. Being where you are now is never good enough. You know you’re capable of more. While it is tempting to compare yourself to everyone else in the room, it’s important to remember that dance is what you do and you do it for a reason. It is both an external and an internal experience that cannot be ruined by anything or anyone other than yourself.
Life isn’t a fairytale, but it sure is a beautiful story.
How can scars fade if you keep making new ones over the old ones?
How can you speak if your mouth is covered with your own hands?
How can you be helped if you refuse it?
A person can erase their “guilt” for their wrong doings in a matter of seconds, yet you can still see it all so vividly. I know life isn’t fair, but how is that right?
What is the bad thing you do? What does it do for you? What does it do to you? Does it still serve its purpose? Does it solve the problem?